Meditation for a Better [Sex] Life
When was the last time you meditated?
A meditation practice is wildly powerful …and under utilized by most of us.
If you’ve ever spent time consistently meditating, you already know it impacts everything from memory, to motivation, to easing anxiety, to improving one's overall sense of happiness (and so much more). This article in The Journal of Sexual Medicine talks about how consistent mindfulness practices have even helped women overcome sexual dysfunction in a variety of studies. No surprise to me! I've been using meditation as a pillar of my coaching for years.
You may immediately jump to ‘I tried meditation, it’s just not for me' and if that's where you're at First name / friend, rest assured that you are not the first person to say that to me (and you won't be the last) and I promise there is a style of meditation that will work for you.
I've compiled a few types of meditation for you to try but I'll space them out over a few emails. This will give you an opportunity to actually try them out. These meditations are my personal favorite. I'll start with the simplest and continue to more complicated styles as we go.
Breath-Focused Meditation
In a previous email, I told you about a few breathing practices that I highly recommend to improve your experience of pleasure. You can use your breath as a tool for a mindfulness meditation as well. Some people feel it’s the easiest way to start meditating. It generally offers the practitioner an instant sense of calm and also helps improve focus and concentration. All of which improves your [sex] life (when was the last time you had good sex that you weren't even focused on 🤨 ).
To practice breath-focused meditation, follow these steps:
Find a quiet and comfortable place to sit or lie down.
Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths to relax.
Start by focusing your attention on your breath. Notice the sensation of the air moving in and out of your body, preferably through the nose.
As you continue to breathe, try to focus your attention solely on your breath. When your mind starts to wander, gently bring your attention back to your breath.
Continue to focus on your breath for several minutes, or as long as you feel comfortable.
If you find that your thoughts wander during sex, this is a great place to start your meditation practice. Once you’ve begun to practice regularly, you’ll notice a marked improvement in your sexual experiences by reducing your overall stress and increasing your ability to be present in the moment. Not to mention that learning to breathe deeply during sex, rather than holding your breath, has major impacts on your orgasm.
Sensory-Focused Meditation
Sensory-focused meditation is a type of practice that involves focusing all your attention on your senses. This practice helps you become more aware of your body and the sensations you are experiencing right now. It enhances your sexual pleasure by increasing your awareness of touch, taste, smell, and sound.
To practice sensory-focused meditation, follow these steps:
Find a quiet and comfortable place to sit or lie down.
Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths to relax.
Start by focusing your attention on your sense of touch. Notice any sensations you feel in your body, such as warmth, pressure, or tingling.
Next, focus on your sense of taste. Notice any tastes or flavors in your mouth.
Then, focus on your sense of smell. Notice any smells in the air around you.
Finally, focus on your sense of hearing. Notice any sounds you can hear in your environment.
Continue to cycle through your senses, focusing on each one for a few minutes at a time. This practice will help you become more aware of your body which enhances your sexual pleasure by increasing your sensitivity to touch, taste, smell, and sound.
On a personal note, sensory-focused meditation was a breakthrough practice for me. I always thought my brain just wasn't designed for meditation until I started practicing sensory-focused meditation with my coffee every morning. Try it ☕️
Hold your coffee cup with both hands and feel the warmth through the mug into your hands. Notice the full sensation in your hands.
Look at the liquid in the cup, notice the colors, the texture, and how the color of the mug is reflected in the liquid.
Take a few deep breaths through your nose and fully experience the scent of the coffee.
Sip the coffee slowly. Notice all the flavors in your mouth and the sensation of the coffee as you swallow.
Repeat for entire cup.
I'm going to wrap it up there for today. I'd love to know which one you decide to try practicing (or if you've already got a practice you do regularly). Drop a comment below and let me know which style of meditation you're into and I'll be back with a few more suggestions soon!
